Monday, January 03, 2005

This is how I see the first telecast of the year going:

PHYSIOC: Hello everybody, we're coming to you live from Anaheim, Los Angeles to welcome you to a brand new year of Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim Baseball! I'm Steve Physioc, and I'm here with Rex Hudler.

HUDLER: Hi Steve, I am pumped up for the new season!!!

PHYSIOC: A lot of changes for the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim this year. The Angels have picked up a new centerfielder and a new shortstop, and they have two World Series championship rings between them!

HUDLER: That's right, Phys! Arte Moreno is committed to winning, and he directed Bill Stoneman to go out and get proven winners!! Veteran guys who know how to play the game, Phys. They know how to win!!! I am PUMPED UP for 2005!!!

PHYSIOC: The Angels have also made a big change to their name. No longer limiting themselves to beautiful Orange County, the Angels are now the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim!

HUDLER: Yes indeed, Steve. By putting Los Angeles and Anaheim together, Arte Moreno is showing that this isn't just Anaheim's team or just Los Angeles' team. This team belongs to the Southland! And its wonderful fans!!!

PHYSIOC: The Angels have also strenghtened their already division-winning starting rotation by picking up veteran Paul Byrd.

HUDLER: That's right, Phys. Byrd is the word in Los Angeles of Anaheim this year!!!

PHYSIOC: Don't go anywhere. We'll be right back with exclusive interview with Los Angeles Angel General Managaer Bill Stoneman of Anaheim after these messages!

CUT TO COMMERCIAL where Rachel Bilson and Adam Brody eat at Pink's.


PHYSIOC: Welcome back to Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim Baseball! Earlier, Hud and I had the privilege to chat with General Manager Bill Stoneman. This is how it went:

CUT TO FOOTAGE OF A HAL 9000 COMPUTER sitting by the third-base baseline across from Phys and Hud.

HUDLER: Hey, Bill Stoneman, are you PUMPED about 2005?!?

STONEMAN (monotone): Yes.

PHYSIOC: Bill, a lot of changes this year. Cabrera, Finley, Byrd. How do you see the Los Angeles Angel chances of Anaheim this year?

STONEMAN: We have a good team.

HUDLER: Bill, how pumped is Steve Finley? Last year he was a Dodger, and now he's an Angel, and he didn't have to move!!! He's still in Los Angeles!

STONEMAN: We are excited to have Steve Finley on our baseball team.

PHYSIOC: Thanks for your time, Bill.


PHYSIOC: After these messages, we'll be back for the first pitch of 2005!

CUT TO THE ANGELS GETTING SHUT OUT, with the opposing pitcher throwing a perfect game.

First... that was awesome.

Second, wow this offseason is making me feel sick too. TLAAoA? OMGWTF. But hey, we got Paul Byrd!!!

Blech. Worst to first... to kinda first, to worst!!!
I must be the only person who likes this move. I hate Orange County. This is the first move the Angels have made this season that I really agree with. I just hope they add Los Angeles to the road jerseys.

I don't seem to remember anyone having a problem when the Los Angeles Rams played in Anaheim.
And I know you have this thing about Stoneman in interviews, but really, what would you rather have him say in interviews? Is there a GM who provides any more information than he does? I'd prefer they not waste the time on the interview, but I can't blame Stoneman for being tight lipped.
I like Stoneman in interviews, I just think it's kind of funny. I tease out of love.
And I don't really hate the Los Angeles thing, I think it's silly and ill-conceived. I don't think it actually makes anything better. I think it alienates people in the OC and comes across as poseur-like to people in LA. I don't buy that it will actually increase revenues, though I'm sure Moreno has a great deal of research behind him, so I'm not going to argue that point.

I do think it makes the team look like kind of a laughingstock, but it doesn't ruin my life. But it's going to be a while before I get over the absurdity of the "of Anaheim" stuff.
People will make jokes today and tomorrow, and people will make jokes the first few days of the season, and maybe the opposing broadcasters will say something to their local fans the first time they meet, and that will be it. I really don't think this makes them the "laughingstock" that people think it will.

I'll take a team that wins with a laugingstock name. From where I sit, there's a lot of crappy teams that shouldn't be laughing at anything.
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