Chronicles of the Lads

A SERIES OF MEMORANDA
TO: Steve Physioc
FROM: Chronicles

When the Angels trail 4-1, and score one run to make it 4-2, they have not "cut the lead in half," as you have stated at least twice this season. They have cut the lead to half, they have cut the lead by one-third.

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TO: Steve Finley
FROM: Chronicles

You are the slowest center fielder I have ever seen.

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TO: Esteban Yan
FROM: Chronicles

Hey, Sucko: I'm glad we didn't win the bottom of the ninth, your sucky ass didn't deserve the win.

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TO: Mike Sweeney
FROM: Chronicles

Join us.

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TO: Garret Anderson
FROM: Chronicles

The next time a ball gets by you, try running hard after it instead of jogging like Getting There is just an option.

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TO: Adam Kennedy
FROM: Chronicles

Not that I'm complaining, but I think if you keep hitting doubles to the left-center gap to score Orlando Cabrera from first, our opponents may begin to catch on.

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TO: God
FROM: Chronicles

Thank you for creating the Kansas City Royals.

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TO: Dallas McPherson
FROM: Chronicles

Now that's what I'm talking about.